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I also definitely don't want her raising my future children, though, and I'll be very clear about that. It all depends on the girl. I love my former Mormon friends and family, but a relationship requires devotion and trust and understanding. I think in most situations its either you join or she leaves- either you, or the church. We had lots of sex and fun.
I have a tendency to be overly sensative emotionally and the trauma of being forced to choose between someone I love and want to spend the rest of my with and Eternal Mormon Celestial Salvation caused me extensive emotional damage that I have struggled with ever since. Because I have a husband that is not a member I have a quasi like status in the ward. A lot of people are religious. I envy all you lonely doctor wives. As the patriarchal leader, it will be up to you to figure it out and to dispel her unrealistic fantasies. Response to your edit: Do NOT bring up or mention anything that could be considered "anti Mormon.